God as the Center of the Romantic Bond

Why do I as a man love women? Why am I inclined to fall in love with women? Because God made it so. Because God or evolution or whatever you want to call it put inside of me a kind of romantic program that when stimulated by certain attractive behaviors or displays of beauty in the opposite sex lead me to become infatuated with particular women, an infatuation that potentially could develop into love especially if the object of my affections showed signs of “liking” me in return.

I remember when I was 12 years old all of a sudden women (my female classmates the same age as me or one year older) suddenly became this huge thing for me. Like all of a sudden out of nowhere it was girls girls girls on my mind. “So this is what puberty is, what puberty is about” I thought to myself.

Why though? Why did this obsession with girls suddenly hit me like a ton of bricks when I was 12 years old? The answer is because God willed it; because God or evolution or whatever you want to call it put a romantic program inside of me for the purpose of getting me to be obsessed with and adoring towards and dominant towards and protective towards women.

If I was in a healthy society and a healthy culture I would have been taught what my purpose as a developing man was; how my feelings towards women were meant to be matched with caretaking behaviors towards women and responsibility and duty on behalf of women and I would have been instructed on the need to develop my power and capabilities as a man so that I could become a “real man” ready to take on my masculine role and responsibilities in society overall and as a future husband in particular. Alas however because of feminism no such instruction was given to me and efforts to assert myself and develop myself were actively fought against and sabotaged so that my feelings towards women were not joined with any kind of practical ability to actually meet the needs of the women that emotionally I loved very much; this then leading to my failure with women due to my inability and unwillingness to meet their needs as women.

What was missing in the culturally defined meaning of relationships between men and women was God; God being what gives noble and idealistic purpose to ones romantic relationships with the opposite sex and God being what the source of the male role and the female role is in romantic interaction with each other. What I was left with by default was a kind of female supremacy where I had to “prove my worth” to women that I liked while having no concept of what it was exactly that I was supposed to expect or demand from the woman in return. Even worse whatever demands or expectations I might have come up with regarding what I demanded or what I wanted from a woman would have simply been based on a kind of selfish orientation of “what I wanted in return;” this presupposing that I had something to offer the woman in the first place which would then be the basis of my bargaining power with her. This assumption being sadly mistaken as I had nothing to offer the woman anyways and so had no bargaining power with her regardless.

Mutual selfishness or mutual self-interest seems to be what relationships are based on in the mainstream feminist culture. This may appear workable for people who are reasonably functional and competent but such a relationship is based on mutual theft from the other, men withdrawing their natural level of support from women, and children getting short-changed by the mutually selfish outlook of their parents leaving the child in a weakened position when they grow up so that the child’s level of competency when they finally enter into their adult romantic lives will be less than what their parents were able to achieve.

The only way to escape from the mutual selfishness or contract style reciprocal type of relationship model is through God. Without God all you have is selfishness. Romantic relationships and family relationships in general do not work well based on selfishness or mutual self-interest. By necessity in family relationships there is dependency and obligation and a need to sacrifice for the other idealistically. Mutual self-interest is fine for business transactions but it is not functional or ethical as a foundation for family life. For family life to work you need God; you need obedience to God and service to God as the central theme and the central organizing principle.

God or evolution or whatever you want to call it made males and females different; this is the first thing you have to understand. The masculine male identity in a family context is very different from the feminine female identity. This is simply the way it is, the consequence of men’s and women’s different inherited strengths and inclinations and desires and the resultant maximum functioning relationship model that is derivative of these inherited differences between men and women. Men provide for and protect women in a material practical sense. Materially speaking men give and women receive. Men lead and plan and set the rules; women submit to men and operate based on the authority men delegate to them. Each individual man must obey the male community; women then obey men based on the man himself obeying the male community. The interests of women come first; men are to sacrifice for women and act on behalf of women; male authority being used to serve women’s objective interests as understood and determined by men. Women specialize in hands on personal caretaking of others, especially where human relationships are of primary importance (such as with children); women maintain the household engaging in a wide variety of different activities throughout the day. Men are more abstract strategizing and planning, they specialize in doing a few things expertly and repetitively, they work at jobs and make money; money which is then used to support the woman and the family. The source of these gender roles being the inherited God imposed differences between men and women.

After understanding and accepting that men and women really are different leading to different roles and different identities based on ones inherited sex then you need to understand what your moral purpose is in a romantic relationship with the opposite sex. The important thing to get is that your moral purpose is to serve God; God being the ultimate source of all morality. As a man your purpose is not to serve the woman for the sake of serving the woman, instead you serve the woman as a means of serving God. Your purpose is also not to serve yourself or to “get what you want” from the woman; instead the meeting of your own needs as a man is derived from you acting out the role God has granted to you as “the man” in the relationship. Doing what God intends for you to do being rewarding and gratifying in its own right and in addition securing and protecting your own emotional needs as a man is something you have the right to do to maintain the health and functionality of the relationship you are in.

What you do on behalf of the woman is not done to secure the approval of the woman; instead you do it simply because it is what you owe the woman based on the duties of your masculine role as a man; duties ultimately imposed upon you by God. It is not you as an individual man who decides what you owe a woman, it is not the woman herself who decides what she is owed as a woman, it is not you and the woman together deciding what you as a man owe her as a woman, it is God that ultimately determines what you as a man owe her as a woman. Your responsibilities as a man are based on the objective reality or the objective truth of what men owe women.

Hopefully, in a well functioning world, fulfilling your God imposed duties on behalf of women will indeed win you the approval of women and will be appreciated by the woman in question. However the goal of your behavior is not to win women’s approval, it is instead to serve women’s interests; women’s objective interests. The goal of your behavior is to do your duty on behalf of God. You serve God and hopefully maybe the woman will love you and want you for it but you serve God regardless. Ultimately you serve God and serve women’s objective interests as defined by God no matter what even if the woman despises you and rejects you for it. Of course in reality we all know that a feminist woman will hate and despise any man who places the will of God above her own will as a woman but this simply means it is wise to avoid a feminist woman and to seek out a Godly traditional woman instead. Still the point remains; the goal is to please God. Attracting women to you then being a predictable side benefit.

As a man who is God oriented you want a woman who is God oriented. You serve her as a means of serving God; she serves you as a means of serving God. Both of you then are idealistic with a generous instead of selfish orientation who give to each other the best you have to offer rather than the least you can get away with. If you as a man are God oriented and idealistic while she is selfishly oriented then you will find that you are doing a lot of giving while she is doing a lot of taking; that basically the woman is abusing you and “taking advantage of” your idealistic and generous orientation. Then you will have to punish the woman to get her to stop her abusive selfish oriented behaviors. This will be a chronic problem as long as the woman continues to be selfishly oriented in her outlook. You want to avoid this problem ahead of time if possible and seek a woman with a good moral foundation who is focused on “doing the right thing” rather than focused on “getting what she wants” or trying to always figure out the best deal she can get for herself.

God needs to be at the center of your relationship with a woman. A relationship with a woman is not just you and her together; instead it is you, God, and her where God is the intermediary between you and her. How you treat her and how she treats you is based on your and her God defined gender roles in relation to each other with the primary goal of each of you being service to God by means of serving the other. A relationship between a man and a woman is not based on negotiation and mutual agreement between the man and the woman; instead it is based on both the man and the woman following the roles and duties assigned to them by God in service of God’s design and intention for them as a couple.

Related Articles:
What the Superior Power means to me as an Atheist
A Woman’s Sacred Right to Chivalry

About Jesse Powell TFA

Anti-Feminist, MRA, Pro-Traditional Women's Rights Traditional Family Activist (TFA)
This entry was posted in Philosophy, Relationship Dynamics and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to God as the Center of the Romantic Bond

  1. K. Q. Duane says:

    Reblogged this on It's the Women, Not the Men! and commented:
    This is the inherent, and crippling, curse of radical feminism, for the women who chose to substitute feminism’s ideology for the tenets of their Christian faith.

  2. That was well said, thanks, I enjoyed reading.

  3. Thanks K.Q. Duane for reblogging my article at your website:

    It’s the Women, Not the Men!

    I’m glad you liked it. 🙂

    It seems to be really hard for atheists to get into their heads what I call the “God concept” but still I think it is absolutely necessary. Without God or a “God concept” things just degenerate into a kind of chaos where only the simplest forms of morality can be understood and where there is a very strong tendency for people to think that whatever they want is good and right simply because they want it. This article here is my effort to try to communicate what a “God concept” is to atheists (and others not tied to religion) and why having a “God concept” is important for having a moral functioning life whether one is religious or not.

  4. Pingback: In Defense of Male Dominance in Romantic Relationships | Secular Patriarchy

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