The Legacy of Tong Sheng

In the traditional understanding of love men are supposed to take care of women; men as a group are to collectively take care of women as a group and in addition a man as an individual is to take care of a woman as an individual. The individual man takes care of an individual woman in the context of a romantic couple while men collectively create social rules and laws intended to take care of women as a social class in general.

A man loves women in general and then the man loves an individual woman in particular as a manifestation of his love for women in general.

Men compete with each other for the affection of a particular woman that both men want but at the same time men cooperate with each other for the overall goal of taking care of women in general. It is honorable for a man to be the best man he can be in an effort to win a particular woman over all of his male competitors for that woman and then at the same time for that same man to work cooperatively with his male competitors to create social rules and expectations meant to serve women in general. In this way the man serving women as an individual and also serving women as part of the male collective; both of these being ways to serve women and both of these being an expression of a man’s love for women.

The woman choosing the particular man she wants to be with is part of this process of men taking care of women as best men can; the woman being with the man she wants most indicating that that man is the best most able man to take care of her and in addition that man has won the prize rewarding him for his efforts to make himself a better man.

What happens however if you are a man who loves a particular woman and wants to take care of a particular woman but you are unable to fulfill that role in this woman’s life; then the other man who also loves this woman is no longer your competitor, instead he is your ally, a man with the same goal and the same purpose as you. He will take on the purpose and mission of taking care of the woman that you love in your absence so that the job of taking care of this woman is fulfilled and accomplished even if you yourself are not able to fulfill this role. In this way the two men who love the same woman become partners rather than competitors.

Such is the theme of this beautiful tragic love story of Niuniu and Tong Sheng as told in the Youtube video “My Boyfriend Died of COVID-19.”

Below is the letter that Tong Sheng wrote to the future boyfriend of Niuniu as Tong Sheng was close to death from COVID-19:

“When you’ll see this letter, congratulations for being Niuniu’s boyfriend! I envy you because you have my same talent. You managed to be with a woman so beautiful. I’m going to tell you a few things you should pay attention to. Keep them in mind.

1. Niuniu is very stubborn. Sometimes she gets grumpy. You’ll have to bear with her, unconditionally. You’ll have to protect her your whole life.

2. When she has a headache, right as it starts hurting, you have to take care of her. When I was around I would massage her temples. She would soon fall asleep and the pain would stop. Take notes.

3. Niuniu has one flaw which I tried to fix, but wasn’t able to. She binge watches TV shows until she loses her knowledge of time. I don’t think it’s good for her. If you love her, help her change this habit.

4. Become her partner in life’s adversities. I wish you to respect each other and learn how to forgive.

5. I don’t know where you’re from, where you live, what you do, these things are not important. If you love Niuniu like I love her, from the bottom of my heart, that is enough for me.

Thank you for taking care of her.

You have my blessing.”

This is Niuniu’s former love speaking to Niuniu’s future love from the grave. One man to another man; both dedicated to the same woman; both with the same shared purpose and mission of taking care of and loving Niuniu. This is Tong Sheng trying to influence Niuniu’s future husband to be a better man for her, taking care of Niuniu after he is gone as best he can through the mechanism of giving some good advice to the man who will replace him so that he will be a better man for her.

Along with this message to Niuniu’s future husband Tong Sheng gave Niuniu the password to his bank account to enable him to give all his assets to Niuniu as an inheritance, more than 100,000 yuan, money that was being saved up to enable Tong Sheng and Niuniu to buy a house together. Tong Sheng then finished things off with a final message to Niuniu; “In my whole life, I have only loved you.”

What I find so touching about all of this is that it makes perfect sense to me. Tong Sheng had a feeling of love for Niuniu and a purpose to serve her and take care of her both combined. As he found himself dying of COVID-19 in his mind his purpose in life was to take care of Niuniu; that was true in happy times a couple of months before when he and Niuniu were planning on picking a lucky day to get married as the Cherry Trees blossomed in Wuhan and it was true in dark times as he was getting ready to die tragically and prematurely; his purpose was to take care of and love Niuniu either way. So, as he was getting ready to die, he had the inspiration that the greatest contribution he could make to Niuniu’s future was to positively influence her future husband on her behalf; to form a bond with the unknown man that would take his place and give to Niuniu through the man who would replace him the life that he had intended for Niuniu with himself.

May Tong Sheng’s legacy be fulfilled as he wished; that Niuniu find a good man to replace him.

About Jesse Powell TFA

Anti-Feminist, MRA, Pro-Traditional Women's Rights Traditional Family Activist (TFA)
This entry was posted in Men's Duties and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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